How Men Fall In Love: Stages And Psychology Of The Male Brain

Neurologically, men and women are largely the same even with societal differences in gender roles and behaviors. You need to have this in mind as we proceed.

How Men Fall In Love


So while we specifically address how men fall in love, keep in mind that to a great extent of it applies to how women fall in love too.

One important thing every woman needs to know is how to discern when a man is falling in love with you.

Read: Qualities To Lookout For In A Man Who’d Make A Great Partner

It is obvious that men tend to talk to people they’re interested in about their future plans and what they want out of life when they’re in love. Usually, singles live and plan for themselves only. It is not about being irresponsible, but it is just nature. When alone, you plan for just you. But when interested in a partner, you tend to involve them in your plans, either short or future plans.

Read: Platonic Relationship: Rules, Types And Boundaries

So be mindful when he is asking you about the future, this can be a sign that he’s checking if you fit some or all the boxes and wants to have a future with you as a potential partner at the moment and farther into the future, marriage and probably thinking about having a large family with you.

Naturally, when men fall in love, they will go out of their comfort zone for you. This does not insight foolishness. When it comes to what makes a man fall in love, men who fall in love will be less or not afraid to try new things with you.

A guy who doesn’t hangout may want to spend time with you just to share a moment. He may want to get on that ride he’s afraid of because of you. He might try out French fries because you like them.

Love doesn’t mean you should force someone to leave their comfort zone, but many of us do it naturally and be happy with ourselves, ‘that’s called love’. With true love, great compatibility and sure, mutual respect, these qualities might encourage any man falling for you to try new things with you.

Read: Pillow Humping: 12 Pillow Humping Method For Beginners

Did he use a pet name instead? Great, because when a man falls in love, he may refer to you with a pet name. This can be a sign of chemistry taking place within his laboratory and it is a way to show they are paying attention to you, seeing you in a loving way and might be considering a future with you.

Time: When a man is in love, he may drop everything he is doing just to talk to you or spend time with you. This isn’t to say that they don't need time to enjoy their hobbies, but it means that he’ll make time frequently to talk to you and to be with you.

Does he flaunts you? Guys tend to flaunt someone they love or falling in love with to their friends, family and others. When guys fall in love, it means that he'll want to tell his friends and family about you.

When men are in love, they often want to make you cheerful. It’s like your happiness is their concern. This doesn’t mean he has to sacrifice his own happiness to make you happy, but it means that most men will naturally want to do more to make you happy. You’ll get a sense from how he tries to make you feel if you’re wondering whether he is in love with you.

Passion and a high sex drive may come to play when he feels something for you. However, a man who has a sense of reasoning that he is in love will not focus his entire being on sex because a good relationship is never built on sex. Many men become more emotional when falling in love and they may be interested in getting to know you on a deeper level. If he is really interested in just you, he’ll put other people he talk to romantically out of his life.

The key is that when most men fall in love, they’re willing to show trust, vulnerability and love after the initial attraction. One of the ways of showing this could be simply by walking the dog together, etc. This is an act of commitment and focus on the part of a man in love.

It does not have to be dramatic or permanent either, but there is a conscious decision made to move forward in love and it involves spending time together. There are of course stages to this love, but keep an eye out for qualities and traits you see in them that might, in fact, point to them being in love.

Emotions differ from gender to gender:

Most ladies have been bamboozled with the idea that time changes a man’s feelings. But I have discovered that to be the opposite. He’ll surely develop a sense of attachment to you, but falling in love without that first spark is delusion. Women can build on love over time, but it is a completely different scenario for men.

Read: 9 Big Emotional Needs In A Relationship That Binds It

Women are more emotional. Women can grow to love someone they were not initially attracted to once they get to know the person better. On the other, for men, the reverse is the case.

Men need the initial attraction before they can be open to meet the person they will eventually fall in love with. And that is why you get so many compliments like “you’re beautiful,” “you’ve got a lovely smile” yet, no one is taking you serious. They are simply attracted to your beauty but need to know you so they can fall in love.

Read: How To Build Emotional Intimacy In A New Relationship

Now you’re wondering how men fall in love. What really goes on in a man’s mind?

Let’s look at the stages men go from first to last before eventually falling deeply in love with the right lady.

Psychology of how men fall in love

Read: What Are Some Psychological Facts About Love?

1. Reaffirmation.

After taking a plunge falling in love, there is the stage of maintaining the relationship. Reaffirmation of love must come day-by-day. It can be simple as saying, "hey dear, I so much love you," watching your favorite TV shows together or bringing a cup of coffee to the bedside every now and then. The reaffirmation of love also comes in bigger forms like soothing your partner in rough times, showing your womanly side, finding common ground in arguments, aiding them in illness or other setbacks, and encouraging them, supporting and helping them accomplish their goals. The point is that love needs to be reaffirmed countless times in your life together through words and actions.

2. Falling In Love.

This process is what we refer to as falling in love. So how does a man fall deeply in love? From meeting each other to years of reaffirmation, this is the work of falling in love. When it comes to what makes a man fall in love, if work is put into a relationship, partners often attest that love grows with each day. Falling in love is a continuous process for both men and women. 

Falling, growing, and staying in love is an incredible experience. When it comes to what makes a man fall in love, it may not be as easy as it looks in romantic movies. Everybody has bad days, arguments, and even relationships too. And there are days filled with great excitement. And for the bad days, the good news is that you don’t have to struggle alone if you’ve got a partner.

Four stages men go through before falling in love

It takes more than a kiss for him to love you.

Sometimes ladies get hooked on the wrong guy. A friend of mine, Ivy has been seeing this guy for five years now and whenever I see them together, I feel sorry for my friend.

Ivys’ boyfriend takes very good care of her. He has never laid a finger on her. He reaches her on her cell phone several times a day. He helps with the meal whenever he can or if she is little bit down, he helps with her laundry and supports her financially whenever he can. He sure makes Ivy happy. He’s such a gentleman. Sadly, being respectful, kindhearted, handy, etc isn’t all that counts in a healthy and futuristic relationship.

Unfortunately, there was this one thing that was odd in their relationship, (absence of tiny spark). There’s no single spark or a sign of any form of attraction between them. On this faithful day, I summoned the courage to speak to my friend about her feelings for her significant other.

I was left in awe because it turns out that she is very much attracted to him, which was great. But he had made it clear to her that their relationship won’t go past casual.

I asked in shock: “what did you say?” funny, she said it again like I didn’t hear the first time.

I further asked “what are you still doing with him when you know where he stands in the relationship?”

Her response was even more outrageous. She said she has fallen in love with him. That he was the only guy that has ever made her feel special and that she hopes that one day, he’ll change his mind and love her back if she stayed with him.

The first stage is: Infatuation.

While women may fall in love on the first conversation, men are only attracted to a woman because of her physical qualities that they like and nothing else.

It is obvious that men go for the look first before anything else. The outer shell (appearance) of their potential partner is a big deal. In fact, it is a bigger indicator of the overall attractiveness. Men are initially attracted to women based on a physical connection. There must be some sought of physical attractiveness first and then loves the person.

Note that it doesn’t necessarily have to be the complete package. Every man has his own preferences for what he likes in a woman, be it her legs, her face, her simply smile, the way she talks or just the way she runs her hands through her hair.

A man may appreciate many women almost at the same time, but he does not fall in love with all of them in reality. Appreciating a woman isn’t bad. Simply telling a lady how ‘gorgeous’ she look is cool. If a man appreciates a woman and is interested in dating her, he enters the infatuation stage immediately.

Men can chase a woman of interest in diverse ways, if she doesn’t accept his advances, he’ll move on to the net available lady of interest.

It’s easier for a man to love a girl one day and forget that he ever liked her because he has so many stages to deal with before making the deciding to fall in love with her.

The second stage is: Attraction.

When the lady responds to his advances, then, he enters the attraction phase. You should know that up to this stage, he can walk away from her without pain or in quote ‘broken heart,’ even if he is rejected by the lady. And this is because he hasn’t fallen in love yet.

But if a girl shows the slightest sign of reciprocity or interest in the man, or even if he assumes that she is in love with him, the man delves into this stage, the attraction stage. At this stage, he decides to chase the girl and make him like her.

Understanding how men fall in love is tricky, but frankly, he’s far from in love right now. Even at this stage, all he wants is the girl to respond to him.

Read: How To Be A Better Girlfriend In 35 Inspiring Ways

He’ll show mating potential. He plans dates and gives gifts to please the girl. He certainly isn’t in love, but he does want something good to come out of this stage of impressions.

Still at this stage, you need to be mindful of things you do as a slight mistake or wrong action could easily make him change his mind about you. Remember that he hasn’t fallen in love yet. He is still at a crossed road on deciding if he should proceed with you or not. A man has so many things to consider before falling in love.

The third stage is: Declaration.

At this stage, if he can persuade the lady and make her fall in love with him, he is happy. He likes where the dating game is heading.

Do you know that up till this stage, in his quest to get the girl to like him, he hasn’t bothered if he truly likes the lady and if he really wants to date her? Until this stage of love, one goal he was focused on was the girl liking him and not him falling deeply in love with her.

Once she has shown that she has an interest in him, then and only then does he begin to seriously think about whether he wants a relationship with her or not.

Men are more likely to express their love through affection, engaging in fun activities with their partner, and of course, sex. Women, on the other hand, are more likely to avoid negative interactions and show affection in other ways.

Do not be troubled if you hear him say “I wanted to tell you…” or “I have something to talk to you about”, it is completely normal.

Men often take much longer to express themselves verbally and emotionally with their partner and will often wait until they feel very secure in the relationship.

The fourth stage is: Falling in love.

If a man is convinced that he likes the girl a lot and wants to be with her, he enters this last and final stage of love where he is willing to fall in love with her.

On the other hand, if he is not really convinced that the girl is the right match for him, he may start to avoid her or lose interest in pleasing her. Although, the same goes for a woman who don’t find a man interesting.

When a man is in love, he feels more comfortable expressing his true sexual desires without thinking that he will be judged, embarrassed, or mocked.

It is no secret that men and women need sex. But physical intimacy encompasses much more than just sex, including kissing, hugging and teasing. Men need women who make them feel sexually open and who are not afraid to be intimate.

If you notice that your man is acting authentic, like his real self, it is a great sign that he is falling in love with you.

When you’re getting to know someone, it can be tempting to hide who you really are, even if it’s not in a manipulative way. If he’s slowly putting that aside and showing you and his real emotions, it’s a very good sign that he has fallen in love with you.

Falling in love with a romantic partner is a wonderful experience in adult relationships for many. However, it takes time, and the process can be demanding. Know that healthy relationships take work.

Sometimes you may wonder what makes a man fall in love or how does a man feel in love. Whether you’re in a committed relationship, looking for love, or trying to make sense of a new relationship, open communication, and emotional support is very important.

Picture: Pixabay

How Men Fall In Love: Stages And Psychology Of The Male Brain How Men Fall In Love: Stages And Psychology Of The Male Brain Reviewed by Ilalokhoin Jude on 18:25 Rating: 5

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