9 Boost For A Peaceful Relationship - Home

Everyone of us at some point dreamt of a marriage/home where it’s all peaceful. A home you retire to after a hard days job. A home where your troubles just vanish into the thin air.

peaceful-home-filled-with-joy-and-gladness


A home where our kids come running at the sound of our voices seeing their faces glow each day. A home where our spouses are none compared to angels. A home where our spouses are just made for us.

Unfortunately, many only dream of this without working it out. They want their significant other to be well baked already. They forget in life, baking never ceases.

Some have this perfect picture in their heads of the type of partner they want to spend the rest of their life with. They don’t realize that they are also not perfect. Yet they crave for the perfect spouse.

Some get most of their Mr and Mrs perfect from romance movies, novels etc and refuse to accept what is obtainable in the real world.

Some right from their teenage to adulthood, they still keep dream of the perfect guy or lady and when they eventually get into a relationship, they act the romance movies they had in their head.

But, peaceful homes are achievable only if you jealously follow the below secrets of actualizing it.


The Secrets To A Peaceful Relationship - Home are listed below:

1. Your spouse has a weakness.
There is no human without a weakness and the earlier you realize this, the better for you.

There’s no strength without a weakness. So if you focus on your spouse's weakness you can't get the best out of their strength. And guess what? There’ll be no peaceful home.

2. Every relationship / marriage has its own challenges.
Wake up: Marriage is not a bed of roses. Every good marriage you see has gone through its own test of fire. A trying time. A time when others gave up on the marriage. A time one of them almost gave up.

True love proves in times of challenges and it doesn’t mean you’ll sit, cross your legs and watch things degenerate. You have to fight for your marriage.

Make up your mind to stay with your spouse in times of need because it’s just a phase. You don’t know what is at the other side of a coin until you flip it over. Exercise patience and do the needful while waiting. 

Remember the vow “for better, for worse”. “In sickness and in health”.


3. Everyone has a shady history.
Are you an angel? When in a relationship and want you want to get married or already married, it’s good to know some vital things about the persons past and let it be the necessary aspect of the person and stop digging into someone's past like you’re drilling for crude.

What matters most is the present life of your partner. Please don’t get me wrong. The past is necessary but not like you’re mining for oil.

4. There is no faultless marriage on earth.
Get this now: there is no off the rack marriage. Marriage is hard work and I mean hard work.

You must decide to work daily on your marriage. This cut across every area of both lives.

Marriage is like a generator set that needs regular and proper maintenance or servicing for it to keep functioning. If the scheduled maintenance or servicing is not done, it’ll break down when you need it the most. Thereby: exposing you to danger or some harmful situation. 

Don’t be careless about your relationship/marriage.

Servicing your marriage is quite easy only if you want to. And to have a peaceful home, you just have to keep up with the schedule maintenance of it.

Some of the ways to keep up with the maintenance includes: 
Appreciating your partner, Regular dates, Spend quality time with your spouse at home, Be handy in the house, Good communication, Understand your spouses mood per time, Avoid disrespectful behaviors, Respect your in-laws, etc.

5. Every marriage has different levels of success.
Hmmm, this is so true. As long as all fingers aren’t equal, so are marriages. But you could achieve your marriage dreams only if you focus on achieving them without comparing your marriage with anyone else.

The moment you start comparing your marriage with anyone else, you start seeing your marriage as a failure.

Yes, we all want the best for our marriages, you just have to work it out gradually and at your own pace. Marriage X might be running at 280km/h while you can only do 90km/h. don’t stop, just keep moving.

It is important not to compare your marriage with another to avoid marriage stresses. When you compare, you might end up accumulating unnecessary stress on your partner which will eventually have negative impact on your marriage.

Be patient and work things out and before long, your marriage dreams shall come true. Wink!!

6. To get married is declaring fight.
Lots of young and single people see marriage as a means of escape. But they are so wrong. Marriage is a fight. There’re so many things you must fight for to enjoy the peace you dream of and some of them are listed below:

*Ignorance- some people have little or no idea of what they have gotten into and how to relate with others.

*Unforgiveness- some people find it difficult to forgive their partner when they wrong them. If you can’t forgive, then you aren’t ready for a peaceful home.

*Third party influence- this in most cases will always come. Some people are in the habit of poking into peoples biz. They like knocking at the door uninvited. So, how do you manage these uninvited guest?

*Stinginess- goodness: if you’re stingy, you just aren’t ready for a peaceful home. If you notice it’s your significant other that’s stingy, you might need to talk with them gradually so they don’t withdraw completely.

*Stubbornness- yes. Some of your think the best way to prove a point is by being stubborn. You just aren’t ready yet. Get a good means of communication and communicate with your spouse rather than being 
foolishly stubborn at the expense of the peace you desire.

*Lack of love- how do you expect a peaceful home when there is no love? I know when married, the love flame diminishes with time. The good part of it is that you can always rekindle it. Refer to #4 above

*Rudeness- you talk to your spouse rudely and expect them to act like angels? Wake up!!

*Laziness- I don’t have much to say on this. You should know better.

*Disrespect- of cause, just like stubbornness and rudeness, what else do you expect.

*Cheating- gush, it’s like playing hide and seek. Why? Do you know when you cheat on your spouse, you end up not trusting yourself? Everything your partner does becomes questionable because you’re questionable.

If you feel your spouse doesn’t do those things you love like the way a lady out there dresses that got your eyes all popped out, make your wife dress that way.Buy her those clothes and she’ll wear them just for you.

If you feel more loved by another man, talk to your husband about his love for you and he’ll change because he’s got brains.

7. Every marriage is an investment.
Marriage is like a business venture. The amount of money, time and effort put into it will determine the profit. If you don't invest love, peace and care into your marriage, what’s going to be your profit?

8. Marriage is not a business deal.
If you want a peaceful home, you must recognize that marriage is not a business deal that you can terminate at will.

It is permanent and when you start seeing it this way, you will want to work towards achieving a peaceful home.

It needs 100% commitment. Love and respect are the only glue that stick couples together.

Divorce starts in the mind. Never ever entertain thoughts of getting a divorce. Never threaten your spouse with divorce. Choose to remain married. It’s a choice you alone can make.

9. Marriage is taking risk.
This is actually true. You really can’t envisage what will happen in the nearest future. That is why it is good to live each day at peace because situations may change. Also leave room for adjustments each day.

Above all: Be prayerful.





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9 Boost For A Peaceful Relationship - Home 9 Boost For A Peaceful Relationship - Home Reviewed by Ilalokhoin Jude on 09:18 Rating: 5

4 comments:

  1. Uncle J my question is why is marriage a complicated issue? Why does it seem difficult to sustain? Why isn't it lovey dovy all the way?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks!!
    Most relationships lack tolerance and compatibility, making marriage very complicated and sometimes aggressive.
    Other things that could make marriage complicated includes money, expectations, lack of empathy, taking each other for granted, bad communication, disrespect, lies etc.
    Marriages don't become complicated overnight. Most often it starts off as relationship anxiety which develops from physical abuse or trust issues.
    Marriage isn't really ddifficult to sustain if compatibility and understanding is present.
    You can make your marriage lovey dovy all the way only if you recognize it's an investment and you are wwilling to keep investing.
    Guess my next post will be on this.
    Hope you'll come again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the insight. Looking forward to your next post

      Delete
    2. You're welcome dear. I'm sure you'll love it.

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