14 Things You Should Never Say In A Relationship Fight

Have you observed that nobody likes a know-it-all partner? Hence you should not think you’re a pro when it comes to arguing with your significant other.


We all get into fight with our partners for various reasons including the good, the bad and the ugly and tend to say things we really did not plan to say and sometimes, premeditated things too.

It is very important to note the following things you should NEVER – EVER say during a fight with your partner.

Words sad during a fight or when auguring are really damaging. They can leave scars that won’t heal. They can break one completely. Hurting words can render one completely useless.

Some self inflicted victims have attributed their actions to fighting or arguing with their partners.
Words are so powerful that they can make or mal you. Those with integrity choose their words wisely while the foolish speak before thinking.

Some people need to check their mind for loving fights. To them fighting comes naturally and they feel all is not well in their relationship if there’s no fight. They intentionally cause trouble in their relationship just to have a taste of fight.

There are ladies that will tell their man to beat them up to be sure He loves them. This is so abnormal but true. While to others it’s a battleground and they’d rather steer clear of.

Have you noticed the biggest problem with arguing with your significant other? Here’s the problem: there’s no referee, and no one to say, “Hey, that’s enough!” You’re rather left with emotions soaring with great adrenaline rush and there’s every possibility to say things that will land you in an uncomfortable zone in your relationship and in some cases, put an abrupt end to once blossoming relationship.

Things you should never ever say when in a fight with your partner

Is there a right way to fight? Hmmm, I don’t think there is. But one thing to keep in mind when involved in a fight with the one you claim to LOVE AND RESPECT. You must respect your partner while fighting with them. Moreover, why are you fighting? While it isn’t always easy to show respect when in a fight, it’s important to maintain a loving relationship—even in the midst of an all-out war.

Learn to stick to relevant topics and avoid pointless insults as you argue with your significant other.
It’s best for a partner to bow just for peace and revisit the issue when tension is down between you too. Relationship should not be a battle ground for any reason and a partner seeking peace by bowing shouldn’t be taken as a weakling but treated with respect.

“Partners with anger issues will likely burn down the house” – be wise!

1. I should have never married you.
This remark is very toxic and hurtful. Moreover, it contradicts the good times you've shared in the past based on the current troubles you’re facing in your relationship. If you find yourself arguing with your partner, keep the argument on topic so that it's a productive disagreement and not a war of words like between two superpowers.

2. You're always on my back.
Stating always and never during an argument doesn't give your partner credit for anything good they've done well in the relationship. Such statement also doesn't acknowledge their little efforts in the relationship. In most cases, stating 'always' or 'never' is untrue and will derail the topic of discussion and paint you as a manipulator of facts.

3. I hate you.
Most often when we get to the point where you want to spew this out, you probably don't mean it. If you "hate" something, you want it gone from your life right?

Whatever we hate has no value what so ever. Sure you’re angry with your partner when you are arguing with them. Do partners fight unfair at times? Yes but with the intention to verbally silence the other.

Ask yourself: Do you really HATE the person you are currently in a fight with? Probably not but words like I HATE YOU sends just this very piercing message.

4. I shouldn't have listened to you.
Here’s the blame game again: Dropping this line during an argument can instill a long-lasting, even permanent, doubt on your abilities. Hearing regretful words like these creates doubt to your love for each other and sends a negative message to your partner that you made a terrible mistake choosing them over others. It can also lower your partner's self-esteem. It is so dehumanizing that they can hate you for life for calling them a mistake.

You will only end up not fixing the problem but blame game and this might make your partner never be as open and frank with you ever again.

5. We’re done.
Feeling unwanted and disrespected is unbearable in a relationship. However, the threat of “It’s over” or “Fine, maybe we should break up” is totally destructive.

Yes, you’re angry but you’re not a 16 year old girl/boy anymore. If you’re really serious about the relationship, you should choose your words carefully as they can’t be taken back.

It’s either you love this person and you want to work it out or you don’t. It’s that simple dear. Don’t pull the word and pretend you’re done with your relationship if it’s only a tactic to hurt your partner. 

You might end up hurting yourself if they take it seriously and walk out of the relationship. If you feel like your partner isn’t taking you seriously, throwing empty threats around isn’t going to help either. Talk things out with them. That’s what mature people do.

6. You never change.
When you bring issues from a previous fight, you're not fighting fair. The truth is that you could be causing them unnecessary hurt by reminding them of their inabilities or flaws.

NB: After an issue has been talked about and resolved, it should be trashed immediately and never to be dug out again.

When you attack your partner about how they never change after past arguments, that is unfair as they might be trying hard to change their ways without you knowing.

Do all you can to keep fights on relevant topic.

7. You’re fat and other body shaming.
If you really know your partner, then you likely know their insecurities. You probably know exactly what area you could target that would both hurt their feelings and make them question their self-worth all at once.

Telling your partner how you really feel about their body—or poking fun at their weight or insecurities during a fight is something you can’t take back. You’ll spend years trying to restore their self-esteem you tore down in a single comment because of anger or just to be the winner at the end of the day. Even if you have a totally legitimate reason for being pissed at your partner, leave their body and looks out of it.

8. You're just like your mother/father.
Never compare your partner to anyone during an argument. It hurts to the bone. Not only does this insult your partner, but it also insults those who are closest/dear to them.

Try as much as possible not to say this to your partner no matter how tempted you are. It's almost impossible to take hurtful words back after they are said. Hence it becomes inevitable to keep a clear head when in an argument with your partner. If possible; say nothing, let the atmosphere calm and talk things through with better reasoning.

9. Reminding your partner about their past errors - Remember when…
Let’s say that your partner revealed a personal secret or said something really insensitive after a few too many shots of Tequila, etc, it is wrong to use a new argument to bring up past mistakes committed by your partner. Rather discuss past errors separately/another day.

When you forgive someone, it means you stop blaming them for their wrongdoing. True forgiveness means letting go of the past and moving on for the sake of both parties. Once you forgive, keep it that way, because you never know when your partner will return the favor of using a past error or mistake against you.

“Wisdom is profitable to direct when talking about your partners past errors/mistakes”.

10. You’re stupid.
Never insult your partner because of their educational level or intelligence. Moreover you knew their educational level and their reasoning before choosing them. if you insult them for any of the above, that's a blow below the belt and shows no character on your part – then you’re the stupid one.

11. Relax.
When in the middle of an argument with your partner, never, ever tell them to “relax.” It makes them look stupid before you. You may end up escalating the situation with the ridiculous word “RELAX”.

It’s important to know that arguing is about stress relief. It is getting worries or burdens off our chest and resolving issues at the same time. Telling your significant other to relax while they’re trying to express their feelings is like intentionally aggravating the situation by slightly making jest of them and intentionally taking them and their thoughts and feelings for granted.

12. Forget it, you won’t understand.
If you discharge your partner, saying they won't "understand," you're actually saying your partner doesn’t know you anymore and that’s heartbreaking.

13. It's fine.
It most certainly not fine and you know this. You’re actually hurting yourself more than your partner because your anger is just piling up.

14. I want a divorce.
With reference to #5, if there's a word you should not use in an argument jokingly or not is "divorce." Using divorce or other related words or phrase like 'I don't think this is going to work anymore,' 'I wish I never would have married you,' can fast track your relationship to hit the rock.

Once such words or statements are let out you can’t withdraw them because they didn’t fall on deaf ear. Trust me; they can put the security of the relationship at risk and question your loyalty to your significant other. They should not be said in any form of argument.

One of the best things you can do while in an argument is to stay on topic. It’s not the time to start throwing out words you’ve kept for decades that you can’t ever take back.

 If you’re wrong, why not accept a little responsibility for your wrong? It takes two to argue and occasionally being the one to say, “Hey, I’m sorry for this and that” will go a long way when it comes to arguing and not hurting feelings of one another.

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14 Things You Should Never Say In A Relationship Fight 14 Things You Should Never Say In A Relationship Fight Reviewed by Civian on 12:50 Rating: 5

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