Effects Of Public Humiliation And How To Deal With It

Public humiliation has become so common among young people that they’ve got slang and body languages to humiliate people publicly for fun thereby damaging their victims self confidence. You might hear “throwing shade” or “trash-talking,” etc which can also mean gossiping or saying bad things behind one’s back and sometimes to their faces.

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Have you experienced public humiliation or rejection by someone who likes to criticize or trash-talks when there are others around? Do you feel humiliated when someone puts you down to make them self seem better or more important/superior?

If your answer is yes, be rest assured you’re not alone. Putting others down is one of the strategies used by those who are insecure. Somehow, humiliating you in front of others and embarrassing you makes them feel better about themselves or gives them temporal confidence and one of such is a manipulative partner. This behavior could be psychological too.

Ever wondered why people humiliate each other? The truth is that most people who humiliate others are really having insecurity issues and they don’t know their behavior isn’t seen the way they want it to be seen. Most of them think they’ll make more friends by appearing smart and funny by humiliating/bulling others.


The reality is that people who humiliate others can’t handle it when they’re humiliated too but that doesn't undo the hurt and pain they caused their victims.

The effects of public humiliation are enormous as those who have been the object of this type of behavior know it’s an awkward position to be in and may become speechless, uncomfortable and develop low self-esteem. It might even cause them to become withdrawn and self-conscious around the people who previously witnessed their humiliation. Counseling may be required if certain body parts or body shaming is involved.

Here are the tips on dealing with public humiliation

Note that it’s not a good idea to try to out-humiliate someone who’s humiliating you right there because it will only get worse as it escalates, makes you more venerable and it doesn’t make you any smarter. Actually, this attitude will drag you down to the other person’s level except you’re super smart.

1. Stop the discussion/walk away.
If you are deeply embarrassed and stocked in, it’s best you end the discussion and take a walk to allow your head clear. But there’s a risk walking away and you should not bother yourself with it ‘Gossip’. The risk is the temptation for those left behind to gossip about you except it was just two of you. But if they do gossip, then it reflects more on their character than yours and you might want to watch the kind of friends you keep.

2. Change the subject matter.
Note that while you can’t make the person take back what was said, you can change the topic of discussion hoping they’ll take the hint - distraction. You might have to change the subject more than once for it to work if it’s just the two of you. But with a third party, chances are that someone will back you up and flow with the new topic.

3. Pay no attention to them.
One thing you should consider doing is to ignore the person like they’re not there when they “throw shades at you,” and talk right over them. Trust me it’s like flashing their negative attitude back at them without saying a word and it pears like a sword to the heart. Note: you might be tagged rude, unless it is obvious to everyone around what the person did and what you’re doing.

4. Tell them to stop immediately.
You might see that the person doesn’t realize what they’re doing is totally wrong. So if you think that is the case, call them out right there on the spot and let them know what they’re doing is wrong and could become harmful. Watch it so you don’t behave the same way toward them.

5. Draw their attention.
With reference to #4, you can also try being more diplomatic when you tell the person how uncomfortable you feel with their behavior. Simply tell them you need to discuss something urgent and privately with them. With this, you’ve gotten their totality and you’re at a vantage point. Once it’s just the two of you, explain how humiliated you feel when they say those things and you’d be glad if they’d stop humiliating you.

6. Laugh along with the humiliation.
It takes some self confidence/boldness to laugh along with humiliation when someone pokes fun at you in public. Laughing along with the humiliation will help diffuse the situation pretty quickly. This quick response from you will let others know that you don’t take yourself too seriously and you’re way mentally matured than the one humiliating you. But there’s a downside of this if the humiliation is cruel or something you don’t want others to know about because this tactic won’t do the job.


7. Stay away from the person.
Look at it from another angle; why do you keep hanging out with someone who derives pleasure humiliating you? Life’s too short to continue putting yourself in position all the time. Being humiliated continuously has a way of resetting how you think about yourself. You think you’re fat because some unserious and jealous person said so whereas you’re just perfect. They’ll make you feel you’re the worst in class not knowing you’re the smartest and most favored.

Note that it’s up to you whether or not you want to tell them if they asked why you’re avoiding them. But if you choose to, do it in private so you won’t feel guilty of embarrassing the person too.

8. Say sorry if you’re called out for being in the wrong.
It is hard for most people to say they’re sorry for their wrong doing. Just the way you expect an apology from the one you call out, so also you should apologize if you’re the one called out. It’s okay to apologize and take back what you said and move on. Try as much as possible not to humiliate others so they won’t feel terrible about themselves and wish they could be anywhere but there.


9. Turn the behavior around subtly.
This method is very effective and puts the person on the spot immediately. When someone embarrasses you publicly, just turn that behavior around subtly by saying “Are you having a bad time?” “Why did you just say that?” or “Do you think what you just said will solve the problem or create more?” trust me, the humiliation will transfer back to the person immediately. Once again you’ve proved you’re far mature than they are.

10. Surround yourself with well mannered and nice people.
The people you surround yourself with play a major role in your life. Find people who are nice, well behaved and wouldn’t think about humiliating you publicly. Though there’s always a Judas in the Twelve, but you’ll have enough support to deal with them. You might not have to say or do anything because your other friends will deal with such behavior squarely on your behalf.



Picture: Pexels
Effects Of Public Humiliation And How To Deal With It Effects Of Public Humiliation And How To Deal With It Reviewed by Ilalokhoin Jude on 16:18 Rating: 5

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